When was the last time you said to yourself, "I love you"?
If you can't remember, do it now.
Be aware of how you feel after saying this to yourself. If you experience any negative emotions or disbelief, just acknowledge it and let it float away. If you can't even bring yourself to say it, it's okay. I'm pretty sure that you would be able to do it some day.
Maybe today's not the day, but one day you would - because, in Britney Spears' words, it's (your) prerogative.
If you can't remember, do it now.
Be aware of how you feel after saying this to yourself. If you experience any negative emotions or disbelief, just acknowledge it and let it float away. If you can't even bring yourself to say it, it's okay. I'm pretty sure that you would be able to do it some day.
Maybe today's not the day, but one day you would - because, in Britney Spears' words, it's (your) prerogative.
Haha random vid :P
I think I'm ready to write something about LOVE - a subject that I've painfully learned to deal with over the last few years.
We always try to find out what attracts people and what repels them. Then we'd look at ourselves and realize how "screwed up" we are because we don't fit perfectly into this mold that we have created from what we ASSUME that people want.
I used to be in love with a guy who had a thing for stick-thin girls - or maybe I should rephrase: I used to be in love with a guy who, I assume, had a thing for stick-thin girls. I obviously wasn't stick thin. I'm freaking mesomorph; it's impossible for me to be stick thin & mentally/physically healthy.
Why he fell for me a mystery. Why we dated for so long is yet another mystery. But long story short - I tried to fit myself into his "perfect girl" image at the expense of myself; which prematurely ended the entire relationship. It's so strange, isn't it? I wasn't me. I looked into the mirror and I just couldn't see myself.
I spent the last 2+ years healing and finding myself & I'm surprise by what I've found. Here are three major things that I've picked up in this process:
We always try to find out what attracts people and what repels them. Then we'd look at ourselves and realize how "screwed up" we are because we don't fit perfectly into this mold that we have created from what we ASSUME that people want.
I used to be in love with a guy who had a thing for stick-thin girls - or maybe I should rephrase: I used to be in love with a guy who, I assume, had a thing for stick-thin girls. I obviously wasn't stick thin. I'm freaking mesomorph; it's impossible for me to be stick thin & mentally/physically healthy.
Why he fell for me a mystery. Why we dated for so long is yet another mystery. But long story short - I tried to fit myself into his "perfect girl" image at the expense of myself; which prematurely ended the entire relationship. It's so strange, isn't it? I wasn't me. I looked into the mirror and I just couldn't see myself.
I spent the last 2+ years healing and finding myself & I'm surprise by what I've found. Here are three major things that I've picked up in this process:
1. My body - the way my face looks, the places that my fats accumulate, the amount of muscle that I have, etc. is, to a large extent, beyond my control.
If you like it, great. If you don't, you might want to consider staying away from me - physically and emotionally.
I workout, I eat clean, I indulge, I take care of myself. I do what I can to keep myself fit and healthy - physically & mentally. How I look is the by-product of my lifestyle. I am happy with the way I'm living my life.
If it appeals to you, welcome to my life. If it doesn't, it's perfectly fine with me.
If it appeals to you, welcome to my life. If it doesn't, it's perfectly fine with me.
2. If it makes you happy, do it. If it doesn't, forget it.
I don't just mean short term, immediate happiness and satisfaction. I'm referring to both long and short term happiness.
Would it matter to me months/years later? If yes, I'm going for it. If not, it's not worth my time & energy.
Would it matter to me months/years later? If yes, I'm going for it. If not, it's not worth my time & energy.
3. Take care of yourself before you try to take care of other people.
If you're not okay, the people around you will get your crap.
A simple example: If you don't sleep enough, you'd wake up tired and moody, your emotions and productivity would suffer & the people working and living with you would have to unfairly bear the consequences of your lack of self-discipline.
Happiness is contagious. People can sense it and people are easily influenced by it.
A simple example: If you don't sleep enough, you'd wake up tired and moody, your emotions and productivity would suffer & the people working and living with you would have to unfairly bear the consequences of your lack of self-discipline.
Happiness is contagious. People can sense it and people are easily influenced by it.
Maybe I'm speaking from an overly privileged position. Not everybody has the luxury of choice to do just walk away from certain things in their lives. I'm kinda idealistic in this aspect. I believe that if you follow your heart (with some logic), you'll lead a life without regrets & full of satisfaction. Chasing after the superficial would only bring you so far.
What happens if you were to dig deep within yourself?
What would you find?
What would you do with what you find?
One important thing that we tend to forget is that love for another must start with love for yourself. Back to my story about the guy who had a thing for stick-thin girls; I had to force myself into this imaginary mold because of my insecurities & my insecurities manifested themselves in my relationships, and became our main stumbling block.
If we're secure about our worth as individual human beings and understand the very fact that you are ridiculously valuable & precious and worth every ounce of love in this world, I believe that our relationships would be much stronger & easier to sustain. It seems to me, that insecurity in relationships tend to stem from insecurity from oneself.
If we're secure about our worth as individual human beings and understand the very fact that you are ridiculously valuable & precious and worth every ounce of love in this world, I believe that our relationships would be much stronger & easier to sustain. It seems to me, that insecurity in relationships tend to stem from insecurity from oneself.
If you're insecure with yourself, you'll never ever be secure in any relationship;
no matter how hard your partner tries.
It's Sunday, 19 January 2014 - remind yourself that you're the most valuable asset in your life. Do it again tomorrow, the day after and every single day that follows.
<3
Vera
<3
Vera